If you know me at all then you probably think I just haven't been to bed yet because you know there is no way I will get up before 8:00 on my own free will! Yet here I am, wide awake sipping coffee out of my badass Batman mug, eating toast while my dog stares at me with her adorable puppy eyes hoping I'll drop some crust for her, which of course I do. It's not that I hate mornings, it's more that I just really enjoy sleep. For some reason that had to be The Good Lord himself, I woke up early with my mind full of thoughts that I had to write down.
I love this town. I love the familiarity of it. I love the school I went to and the teachers who taught me so much more than how to read and write. I love how supportive this community is. With that being said, there is one thing that this year has taught me about this small town life I'm living. It's okay to be different.
I am 23. Something is wrong when strangers would assume I already have a kid or two, or society thinks I should WANT that. Sometimes I want to yell "LISTEN HERE RANDOM OLD LADY AT WALMART, I AM STILL A KID MYSELF!" but I don't do that because well, it's not very nice to yell at old ladies or anyone else really. Instead I say, "I'm just busy making myself happy" and for the first time in my life that is actually true. I believe your 20's are your selfish years. This is the time to figure out who you are. It is a time to make mistakes. Mistakes are how we learn and grow. I want to have fun. I want to be spontaneous. I want to do the things that I'll look back on and tell stories about. I'll be 45 and still smile when I remember that time I jumped into the river naked at 2:00 am. With that, I am saying goodbye to 2014. It started as the absolute worst year of my life and is ending as the absolute best. I cannot believe how good this year was to me.
I keep seeing things that say, "In 2015 I'm going to be a new me!" but I'm kind of loving the ME that I am right now. A lot of people search for happiness outside of themselves, but it is something that you are. It's inside. It's all about how you think.
I read something somewhere that said you should be completely obsessed with the life you are living and I realized.
Holy shit.
I am OBSESSED with my life.
(This should probably be embarrassing to admit to the world, but I honest to God creep my own Instagram account. That is how I learned I was obsessed with my life.)
2014 taught me so much. I've learned about being strong. It's a weird thing...you find your strength when you don't even think you are strong enough to stand. I learned about forgiveness and how it's not for the other person but for you. I learned to not rush and never settle but probably the best thing 2014 has taught me is that not only is it OKAY to be alone, but it's OKAY to enjoy it!
